I'll admit it, I've been uninspired for the past 8 months. I think a lot of it has to do with my Avo Velma passing away. I miss her so much and although she never read my blogs, or knew all my thoughts, she was always such a positive influence in my life and her power of love was stronger than any language.
She was kind. She thought of others always. She was always willing to go the extra mile to help. She was someone who made you feel happy just by being around her. She didn't have any material things, and didn't need them.
I've wanted to emulate a life like my Avo lived but I was struggling.
I wasn't radiating happiness like I used to. I allowed my light to dim and to not shine it so brightly.
My Avo always called me her sunshine and I haven't been as sun-shiney.
It's not like my life isn't good, my life is incredibly full of blessings, but for awhile I just wasn't being the Kody I knew and loved and most importantly she knew and loved.
Sometimes we need to make decisions to put our lives back on track, to allow ourselves to be welcomed home again, home to ourselves.
Turning into someone you are not is not a good thing to do, its very dangerous.
You lose sight of yourself and in my case I turned into a person I didn't like who I was becoming.
I was easily angered, annoyed and less cheery. I was hurtful and not in a good place.
God led me back into the light. He showed me that my feelings of uncertainty in where I was, were validated. He showed me that I didn't need to settle for anything less than the plan He created.
When we try to take life in our own hands and force happiness upon ourselves, in God's time He always reveals the truth.
Trust and turn to God. It never EVER fails. He knows all and takes us back even when we stray off course. I know I may seem like a broken record of sorts because how many times have I written blogs about trusting in God's plan...but we are human and I need my come to Jesus moments every now and then to bring me back and remind me I'm not in control.
Keep trusting in God and be patient for what He has in store.
I'm sure what He has in store for my life is so worth waiting for and even on days of even the sliver of doubt, I want to turn to Him and be certain that my life is in the best hands possible.
I'm inspired again, INSPIRED by GOD.
